Ethiopia and Back...

Wow, can't believe I spent 9 amazing days in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia with team of 20 great people from NCC! I am very grateful for an opportunity to go and experience little part of Ethiopia in Addis Ababa. It seems like I just left for Ethiopia two Fridays ago and time flew by. God has definitely broken my heart while I was in Addis Ababa and I believe He is continuing to teach me what I learned in Ethiopia. One of the values for NCC is expect the unexpected and there were lot that I did not expect out of the trip. For instance, I am a workhorse and I give 120% or more to what I do but God convicted me that I need to be okay with not having plans and that plans change. God does not expect me to give so much of myself that I eventually break down. I believe that what I think is best may hinder my walk with Christ if I do it with the wrong attitude, wrong intention and/or wrong execution. There was time in the trip when I finally broke down (Monday evening to be exact) and I had to give what was upsetting me all to God. With prayer and talking with a friend on the trip, I came to realization that I just have to go by the flow. Rest of the week was challenging but great. God gave me such peace about everything that was going on in the week that I did not care I was going out of my comfort zone for rest of the week. Every experience I had on the trip I will treasure and remember but here's some of my highlights of the week:

*Visiting home of family who lives on Entoto mountain and drinking delicious Ethiopian coffee(roasted, ground and specially brewed in coffee pot over fire) and eating delicious food.
*Teaching/tutoring ESL
*Co-leading Self-Help group with two fantastic group members
*Designing jewelry and getting it approved to be sold
*Volunteering at a feeding center
*Eating dinner with street kids
*Seeing baptism

There's so much that occurred while we were there and I feel overwhelmed by what I experienced. I need to process what I experience more and I will try to blog more about it as I try to understand what I experienced in Ethiopia. Thank you for all the prayers and may God pour His love over you!

Encouragment

I'll be honest. Lately, I just been facing a lot of discouragements and disappointments. It's just not from people bring me down but it's also from myself. Remember, I am a recovering people-pleaser (maybe still am) and when I don't meet the expectation of giving the best to my work or to people, I just get discouraged knowing that I failed even though usually I am just underestimating myself and this usually leads to self-disappointment. However, I am learning that it's not about what I can do but what God can do through and in me. Denying the self from being the center of attention and putting Christ the focus of my life. While I have been having this season of discouragements and disappointment, God has been so faithful in refilling me with encouragement through His Word and His people. Just the other day, this man showed me kindness by going out of his way to do something that he didn't have to do. Or when one of my favorite friend from church in the whole world helped with cooking dinner. And then I love when I see my friends whom I have not seen for a long time! One of my favorite friend came to visit and is staying for few days in DC. I love staying up (I wish I could have stayed up longer though) and we had a great conversation that encouraged me so much! I am realizing it's the simple act of kindness and word that really encourage me. As I prepare my heart and get ready for Ethiopia, I pray that I can be encouragement for someone who need it right now in his or her life. Thanks for all your prayers and may you experience God's great love! Thanks for reading!

Getting Closer...

I can't believe in two days, the first team is flying over to Ethiopia! Time flow by and wow, what adventure it has been preparing for Ethiopia. I think after I come back from Ethiopia, I decided I am going to take a break from anything related to organizing an event of some sort that includes my birthday. I think I need to recharge and be in solitude. Don't get me wrong, I think it's important to be in fellowship with my family in Christ; however, Jesus went into solitude to refuel by praying and being with the LORD. I need that so much! To be alone with God. Not running around like a chicken without an head. Jesus said to come to Him and He will give us rest (Matthew 11:28-30). So after the trip, I think I am going to have a time when I do absolutely nothing. That's right, you can hold me accountable. I am not going to think about work or anything related to doing something. I may even take naps during my free time and actually watch TV in my living room. All seriousness, I am looking forward to going over to Ethiopia and I am so excited to see what God will do through and in us when we are in Ethiopia. So, I am also excited to be rooming with one of my favorite people when we are in Ethiopia!!!! She has challenged and encouraged me so much. I hope I will give the same encouragement to everyone in the group. Thank you for praying for me and my team (both 1st and 2nd trips). May God give you peace and bless you today! Thanks for reading! 

Thankful!

What a day! I love what the Lord is doing in my life and excited to see what He will do in my life. Today, I had the great privilege of being part of Ethiopia fundraiser event and I am so thankful to God for all that He has done thus far and will continue to do for His glory! Event was great! It was more than I expected to be and I enjoyed the event so much! I loved seeing all the people who attended the event. I am thankful for the generosity of people and their willingness to support the Ethiopia team. I love serving alongside my Ethiopia team (both 1st and 2nd team...actually we're one with two trips!) I am thankful and all the glory to God who has surpassed everything I imagined for a fundraiser event. I am just thankful and I am in awe of Him who is in control. I am thankful to all the people who are praying for me and my team to Ethiopia. Thank you! I appreciate all the prayers and as days draw near for our team to go over to Ethiopia, it is crucial that we are covered in prayer! May God bless you more than you can imagine! Thanks for reading! 

Lent Season

I'm sorry I haven't written in my blog for some time. Life just been crazy busy and I was stressing more than I should have these past weeks. Now, I feel like I can somewhat breath and not stress about the small stuff. In a week, my team (1st trip group) will be heading over to Ethiopia. I can't believe we'll be actually be there in a week! God has been so good and provided so much for me since I said 'I will go'. The hardest part in preparation for this trip has been spiritual warfare. There were lots of people who were questioning why I was going to Ethiopia and even my parents was wondering if this was the right time to go. Fear has been constantly been put into my heart; yet, God has taken that fear out and put in peace. God has continually reminded me that if I go, He'll take care of the rest. Even though I may not have enough love to give, God overwhelms me with love that I can't help loving on people. Don't get me wrong, there are days when I don't want to love someone who has made my life more difficult than they should or treat me in a way that hurts my feelings. However, I remember that Jesus loved everyone and He commanded His disciples to love your enemies. What a challenging commandment! 

Yesterday, I had the great opportunity to attend an Ash Wednesday worship service at a church with two of my favorite people! I am so glad I went to the service because I was able to learn more about what Lent was all about. In the bulletin, it said "Lent begins with a solemn call to fasting and repentence as we begin our journey to the baptismal waters of Easter....During Lent the people of God will reflect on the meaning of their baptism into Christ's death and resurrection." That challenged me about my fasting for Lent and what I will add into my life. For Lent, I am giving up Facebook and Twitter. I was just going to do one or the other but due to both features being connected, I wanted to give up both so I will not be tempted to check one or the other. My reasons for giving these up is simple. Facebook and Twitter has consumed me with spending a lot of time when I could be doing something more productive. Since I am subtracting Facebook and Twitter, I am adding more time of prayer in my life. I was talking to a friend about prayer and he pointed out that he talked to God while he's walking to places. I absolutely agree with that and I do that too. I don't think prayer should be just one time deal for the whole day but I see prayer as continually being in communication with God. However, I am setting a time of prayer for myself just to seek His face and have a time of self-reflection. I especially need this time of prayer with upcoming trip to Ethiopia. While I feel confident in the Lord about going, I still have moments when I struggle if I really should be going or should be in states, trying to find a permanent job. I am so weak, yet He is so strong. I trust and pray that God will use both of our teams in Ethiopia for His glory. I pray that you all will draw closer to Christ in this Lent season. Thanks for reading! 

God-Ordained Passion

Recently (by that I mean this week), I picked up reading my pastor Mark's book "Wild Goose Chase" again. When I first obtained the book, I started reading it and stopped because I was not ready to soak in what pastor Mark was writing in the book. This week, I don't know why but I felt led to read the book again. And wow, each chapter has challenged me so much. One chapter that really captured my heart was when pastor Mark challenged the reader about having and pursuing God-ordained passion. Right now, I am not chasing my God-ordained passion. I mean, I am a consultant (more like glorified intern) that make more copies and putting together packets rather than using my talents, skills and training I received all the years I was in school. I felt very discouraged and down these days and reading the book I felt like God was telling me through the book that I need to start chasing my God-ordained passion. But what is my God-ordained passion? I have an idea relating to human rights issue and justice; however, that's far as I got so far. I believe that each individual deserve the right to live where he or she desire, learn as much as possible, work in whatever he or she wants to, be free to travel and pursue his or her passion whether that be God-ordained or not. Lately, God has broken my heart for North Korea and it makes me sad and angry to see the injustice over there. I believe I will be glad when people in North Korea experience the same freedom that I experience here in United States. Another country that God has broken my heart for is Ethiopia. I will soon be going over to Ethiopia and I do not know what God has in stored but I know that He will be glorified. I have the great opportunity to work at a NGO that promotes democracy around the world; however, I would rather be working somewhere that I can directly help with human rights issue and eliminating injustice around the world. Is that too crazy of an idea? So, right now, I am trying to figure out if I should continue working at my current employment location because there's opening in a permanent position or apply somewhere else where I can develop my God-ordained passion. It's a dilemma because on one hand, having a permanent job will get my mom off my back about having a permanent position and on the other hand, I don't want to make any more copies and putting together packets. Sigh, what to do? I put my faith in God and trust that He'll give me an epiphany soon! :) Thanks for reading! 

In God...Greater Things

This past weekend, I had the great privilege of attending NCC leadership retreat and its theme was Greater Things. The retreat was so challenging and inspiring for me. To be frank, I wasn't sure I was qualified or had second thoughts about leading a small group; however, I realized that God uses unexpected people such as Moses, Joseph, Mary, Peter and Paul, just to name a few people in the Bible. So, I am really not great with words and I get nervous talking to people if I don't know them very well. I have a fear of speaking front of people and I can't talk to multi-people at one time. I am more of an one on one or small group person. Yes, I am social but to certain extent. I am only social around people I already know or people at church but other than that, I am really shy around people I don't know very well. I get fumbled when I am speaking to someone I may not know very well or I talk really fast due to nervousness. I think I still have a tendency to please people and try to say the right things but I realized that some people are going to like me for who I am and some people will dislike me no matter what I do. So, this weekend at the retreat, I had a conviction confirmed from God and He has placed in my heart that in 2009, He wants me to love people more without any expectation of receiving that love back. I think God really wants to drill this concept of love in my heart and really live it out. I can't do this by myself but with God, anything is possible and I am praying that He will give me the love to love people and be okay with not getting the love back. To love without strings attached and to love knowing that I may not receive that love back. To put my faith in Him rather than doing it on my own. To set my eyes on Christ and not giving up when it's hard. God will do greater things and I am excited that I get to be part of what God wants to do through me. I feel like I do not have much but God will use my skills, talents and gifts. One of the way I show my love is through my giving not just financially but with time and effort. That's how I say to my friends that I care about them and I make effort to hang out with my friends or send them encouragement or support them financially if they are going on a mission trip. I know that God will provide and what I have will go toward investing in some one's life for His Kingdom. God will use the little I give for greater things. How amazing is that! We have a big God. God who loves us so much that He would show the greatest love of all by sending His Son, Jesus, to die for our sin and Jesus overcame death so that we may live. We have Holy Spirit who is our Counselor and Guide. What a Great God we serve! Lately, I have times when I felt discouraged and down; however, I keep going because of Him who gives me joy and peace. Without Him, I am nothing and what I have is His. Thanks to Him who is Everlasting and Eternal! 

"Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God, trust also in me." -John 14:1