Am I Being Real?

After small group tonight, this question kept on popping up in my head: am I being real? Furthermore, am I being a real Christ follower or am I just doing the motions? Some days, I wonder if I am truly following Christ or acting it all out. I hope that I am living for Christ and following hard after Him; however, I feel like I fail daily. I fail in loving people when I should and I fail reaching out to someone when I should. I question my actions and wonder if I loved the way Christ would love the person I encountered or interacted that day. I don't want to be just "nice" Christian but I want to be fired-up Christian and I don't mean being on temporary spiritual highs after coming back from a retreat or camp. I want to be a follower of Christ that radiate His love and shine for Him. I want to be the light that Jesus was telling His disciples to be to the world. I don't want to be a stumbling block to my fellow brothers and sisters in Christ. I want to encourage, empower and edify my spiritual family. I want to just be real and authentic in whatever I do. I want to really love someone beyond myself. I want to stop being judgemental and start living like it doesn't matter who the person is because that person is son or daughter of Most High King. Sigh. I fail so many times; however, Jesus picks me up and shows me grace, mercy, compassion and patience. Loving people on my own is hard but with Christ, loving people comes natural. I want to love like it's part of my identity. I don't want to fake loving someone and I pray that people will experience true love whether word or action. I want to reflect His love because my love can only go so far. How can a big God love a little person like me? I am so small yet He still loves me for me. Words can't describe how awesome and amazing the feeling of being love by the Creator. "We love because He first loved us." (1 John 4:19). May you experience love of Christ beyond words! Thanks for reading!